Digital Funtown

Oh man, there is no denying how tough it is out there these days. The economy has gone down the toilet to the point where not even the banks have money. Unemployment is rampant. More people are out of work now than at any point in the last couple of decades. It has gotten so bad that businesses are trying to capitalize on unemployment. A national men's clothier is running a deal that if you buy two new suites and lose your job within 60 days you get to keep the suits for free. With the way that the unemployment rate is climbing you would almost be a fool not to jump on those odds. Of course it would be pretty difficult to celebrate your two new free suits while living in your car. That is unless you got a new Hyundai. If you buy a Hyundai and lose your job, they say that they will do you the favor of taking the car back. In That case you lose your job, you lose your car and you’re sleeping down town under a bridge wearing your new suit. Well, at least you’ll still look sharp. You’ll smell real bad, but you’ll look sharp.

These are times that might turn a man to drugs. But who can afford drugs? Well, I've found a way to laugh uncontrollably, unavoidably wet myself and escape life’s misery without drugs. And, best of all, it is absolutely free. I just sit back, plug in and take one of my daily hits of my new go to source for laughter, Short Shorts on Digital Funtown. Just about every selection is hilarious. And, if you are at work, just plug in your headphones. Each skit is just a few minutes long so the odds are pretty slim that your boss will catch you. Unless you’re one of those folk that laughs like a rabid hyena. And if you’re among the currently unemployed, then feel free to turn it up and laugh your broke ass off.

I use to have CNN saved in my Internet favorites so I could skip over and catch up on what's going on in the world, but, as I said, the world is too miserable for news right now. I don't need to seek out bummers packaged in convenient 5 minute clips. Short Shorts skits are funny and topical. A spot on hit on our current times. For example, recently we got to hear all about the pirates who kidnapped the American Captain and tried to bring him to Somalia (BTW, it seems that kidnapping is now the ONLY way anybody gets to Somalia). Ok, interesting enough, but have you seen Pirate Wheel of Fortune? You can’t see this on CBS. The only place you can see it is on Short Shorts. You see the shtick coming from about a mile away, but it still delivers, "Can I get an aaarrrrrrrgghh?"

Sext Messaging hits a little bit too close to home for me to be able to comment on objectively. If Verizon did carry a plan for sext messaging and I were still dating my ex-girlfriend it would be a definite money saver for me. Watch it with someone you love. Another one of my current favorites on Short Shorts is Sitar Hero. This clip is truly inspired. I have lost a few friends to Guitar Hero. They were intelligent, productive people at one time, but I honestly don’t think they have left their house in over a year. If they would actually spend the same amount of time playing an actual guitar they’d be Jimi Hendrix by now, without the rigor mortis. But Sitar Hero takes things to the next logical level. With how serious people take this game and the amount of time they dedicate to it, the possibility of achieving nirvana only seems fair.

But my current favorite Short Shorts selection is, without a doubt, March Madness. I love ESPN, I love college basketball, I love Dick Vitale and I love March Madness. But if you ever have a couple days off in the month of March with nothing better to do except sit around and watch 6 or 7 hours of pre-tournament coverage on ESPN you just can help but witness the absurdity of it all. There really is only so much you can say and only so many ways to say it. After a few hours you start to realize that these people are actually saying nothing at all. The guys who did this skit hit the nail right on the head and slammed it home.

So, if you want an accurate representation of what’s going on in the world, skip the news sites and tune in to a few clips on Short Shorts. Your life is sad enough as it is, let Short Shorts give you a few tears each day from laughter.

What? You've never heard of a Dick Donut before? Well, don't feel too bad -- neither has Roscoe. Poor guy, he's about to learn a hard lesson about the things he puts into his body. The Dangers of the Dick Donut should not be ignored, the phenomena cannot be explained away, the problem is only GROWING in our modern world. So do yourself a favor and get educated, before the Dick Donut gets YOU!

 

Click below to save your soul. (Or at least your lunch...)

Has anybody here ever seen the show "Later with Jools Holland"? It is a British show that comes on the BBC. It is very popular in Brittan. Anywho, the concept of the show is that the host, Jools, invites a different set of about 3 or 4 artists for each show. It is usually a mixture of famous and unknown artists from around the world. They are all assembled together on a stage in a semi-circle around and each artist gets a chance to perform, one at a time. I love this show. It is a constant on my TiVo.

This morning I was making one of my daily visits to DigitalFuntown when it occurred to me how much Organic Groov has in common with "Later with Jools Holland". I get so much more out of my visits to DigitalFuntown than I do with most of the other music sites I was going to. Digging into a performance on Organic Groov is like checking out an Indie Jazz artist at a small, intimate show at a cafe, but with more. The separation between artist and audience disappears and everyone rides the Organic Groov together. It is a true, valid experience. And, like watching a cool set on the tube with Jools, as a viewer you can create whatever backdrop you want for the show. Get it together with a couple of friends, check it out with your girl or just kick back by yourself, a bottle of wine and get into the Groov.

I have friends that have argued that they have to see an artist live to really appreciate them. I'm always telling them to go to DigitalFuntown and check out Organic Groov. I have a group of friends that come over to my place to watch “Later with Jools Holland” and after the show wraps up I switch on some Organic Groov performances. They were instant converts. It is true, nothing can ever replace a live show, but what DigitalFuntown has going on with Organic Groov is something that is completely new. It’s why it is called Organic Groov. You just can't judge it by standards that are already set up. It needs a whole new set of parameters. You have to see this before you can rule on it. It really is an experience unto itself. You get the sound and visual clarity of the best produced music videos and shows. Organic Groov comes to you in mind-blowin' High Definition. You get the fresh, raw intimacy of a live performance in front of live audiences from the most happenin' Smooth Jazz nightclub in Chicago. And after the set, with the artist interview, it's like the performer just finished a set and sticks around for a Q & A with the fans. Plus, you get to set your own environment with a setting that is completely up to you. And, to top it all off, it's free! Combining these aspects make for a new, unique experience that I like to plug into as often as possible. It's the evolution of music. Long live Organic Groov! Long live Digital Funtown!

Art of any kind can be a tough sell, especially when everyone is pinching pennies just a little. Despite this predicament, however, great indie music has never had a hard time flourishing. There is always a market for music, and maybe even more so when times are rough. Hard times bring out creativity in artists, and passion in listeners in a way that simpler eras just can’t inspire.

Possibly no genre of music is affected more by a rough economy than Indie Jazz. There is no greater salve for the troubles soul than a soulful, warm jazz groove. Studies have shown that in times of national stress, popular music tastes invariably trend toward the subtle complexity of genres like Neo Soul, Jazz, and artful funk. During times like these, creativity, and the ability to inspire are the most sought after talents in entertainment.

So Indie Jazz and Neo Soul artists, who will always have it hard, at least get a little break during times like these. Not only do people want desperately to hear their music, but marketing has never been an easier prospect. In this incredibly connected world of YouTube, video blogs, and video media websites are all over the web. Sites like DigitalFunTown.com serve as a perfect link between artists who want to promote themselves in local areas like Chicago, and listeners all over the country who want a chance to sample new music.

Online video sites also serve the unique purpose of bringing people to music that would ordinarily never have a chance to encounter it. A web savvy surfer can watch a small show in Denver that was filmed in DC. Artists can expand their fan base far beyond their comfortable tour locations. Everyone wins in the arrangement, and music has a chance to grow because of it.

Perhaps that’s why it’s no surprise then, that more and more genres of music are fusing together to form new styles. Neo Soul and Indie Jazz are forged together out of classical Jazz popular in the 40’s and 50’s, mixed with infusions of easy listening, pop, and R&B. There could be no healthier progression of music than this hybrid of styles melting together, and there is probably no better place for it than the internet. There are no nationalities online, and no borders. Artists in the US can collaborate freely with those in the UK, or in Asia. The internet is a melting pot like one never before experienced.

In places like Chicago, there is a huge diversity of people, and the artists there are an equally diverse group of entertainers. However, with the advent of the internet, and social networking sites like Myspace and Digitalfuntown, artists can take their music anywhere in the world, and fans can tune in from just as broad a region. Online, ideas and styles can mix, and change to ultimately form the next evolution of modern music.

You've got to hand it to Ballsack (that's what she said), at least he's out there trying. After his career hit hard times, and his roommate got pissed off that he wouldn't stop eating all the damn Hot Pockets, Donald decided it was time to find a new profession to help pay the bills. But how would this beautiful butterfly force its untamed essence back into the cocoon, and in what form would it reemerge?

 

Donald Ballsack went awhile without trimming his trademark mustache, and thought...

 

Then he ran across a posting on Craigslist for an entry-level position at an Ad Agency. So he applied. And he did not sugar-coat his resume, he left everything out in the open -- (genital) warts and all.